Professional vs Lifestyle Dommes - what's right for you?

My Domina friend Ms. Niebla (Fetlife) wrote most of this article with a few tips from me. I am sharing it here to expand knowledge about Dominas and how to approach them according to your needs and desires.

I steadily get messages from people looking for a domme, and every now and then I feel some of them are so specific in their desires, they should really be searching for a pro domme. A lot of people seem apprehensive about this, perhaps worried about reactions or consequences of various sorts. However, visiting a pro domme is often a perfectly viable option and nothing to be ashamed of. Your choice will depend on your desires, intentions and how much commitment you want to invest into your submissive exploration.

What’s a pro domme? …

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Kalyss MercuryComment
If Mistress Loves To Dominate, Why Do Subs Need To Tribute?

Some Slaves have asked me why a tribute is required. After all, isn't Mistress enjoying Herself? Isn't a slave's devotion and service worth anything? Little submissive creatures, your devotion is valuable to me. If I don't enjoy a sub's company, I recommend him/her to another dominant. I live and breathe BDSM- everyday I find more kink in my soul. It amazes me that it just keeps getting better. Yet, regardless of how much I love training my subs, I still have to pay my bills. If I wasn't a pro-domme,

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Kalyss Mercury
Keep Calm & Kink On! Spread Love not the Virus

Dominatrix demands you to obey seven (7) self care tips for the COVID 19 crisis ... We need intense measures. We need someone to tell us what will actually be good for our mind, body, and spirit... For a more drastic, long term change we need inspiring leaders that move us. A loving Mistress or Master may be the most effective choice to actually get the results we need for global change.

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sub Stories: Tantric Toy by Johnny "Loose Lips"

Ms Mercury had done no more than whisper softly in his ear. The sound of Her voice, gentle, soothing, even nurturing and the sensation of Her breath in his ear had caused his body almost to vibrate with physical overload. Ms Mercury with just three words uttered almost inaudibly had caused the release of so many different chemicals and sensations of pleasure that even his aching muscles had been revitalized.

‘Have you missed me?’

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Consensualy Enslaved

…Immediately I was jolted into the awareness of my privilege. My family were slave owners, my parents carried on the cultural servitude of my “black mother”, and now I am a Domina, mistress of countless consensual slaves. In all these years of pro-domming, have I been unconsciously cleansing the karma of my family through replaying slavery but now with consent, kindness and concern for my "servants"? Or are my actions a rebalancing of the fairness scales, as most of my subs are rich, white, privileged males?

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Tantric Domination: The Art of Dancing to Flow

For many years, I've been inspired by the idea of tantric domination. At first, I thought it was simply BDSM play with a conscious intent. Kinky play can be intense, and often involves a considerable exchange of energy between the players. Applying an intention to intense energy exchange, is another word for magic. Some branches of Tantra play with the concept of sex magic, as a means for psycho-spiritual development. As a science and psychology enthusiast, I don't like the word magic. But I do recognise the power of focused intention

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Kalyss Mercury
iFet Inspections: Fetish Factory 20th Anniversary Extravaganza

Can you imagine 4 consecutive days of fetish parties, BDSM play, and naughty adventures in a tropical paradise? Now, imagine more than 1000 kinksters taking over an entire 5-star hotel to join such festivities. This dream exists and it happens every year in sunny Ft. Lauderdale, Florida. It's the Fetish Factory Anniversary weekend! I was lucky to be a part of this year's 20th installment and I'm still recovering from one of the best extended parties of my life!

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Kalyss Mercury
Fet Hacks: Summer Edition

And most fetish gear will make you sweat like a pig, which is not overly sexy, so we kinksters often end up avoiding play due to the discomfort. But that does not have to be the case. Australia has a thriving fetish & kink community, so to manage the heat that pervades for most of the year, we must be creative to achieve our perverted goals. Many of the tips described below may appear to be common sense, but I was surprised how many people in the Nordics never thought of these. So grab yourself a cold drink and start taking notes to enjoy your pervy fun during the summer or when traveling to the tropics.

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Kalyss Mercury
My Favorite Kinks- Part 2

My clients and admirers often ask me what type of fetishes I like the most. As much as a list of fetishes can be of help, I’ve always wanted to go into more details to explain what I really get from each of my kinks and what I feel my subs enjoy from it. Last month, I shared the first half of my favorite kinks… But I love so many things, that I couldn’t fit them all in one blog. So, without much further ado, these are a few MORE of my favorite kinks!

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My Favourite Kinks- Part 1

What are these fetishes and kink activities and why do I love them so much? A dictionary would do an adequate job of explaining the «what», but unfortunately in such a dry manner that it’s hard to understand the “why”. So, without much further ado, here are a few of my favourite kinks!

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Kalyss Mercury
Kinking the Vikings: Oslo Fetish Weekend

What is the purpose of a "Fetish Weekend" style event? Stand alone fetish parties can be fun, but they have a limited scope for interaction. Parties are usually the realm of extroverts, and often introverts may feel out of place and that they have less chance to share their personality. But when people learn together, they often are more open to making friendships. The interaction has a purpose, so it takes the pressure out of "being social", and lets people be themselves.

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Why is it so “bad” to be vulnerable? Men’s struggle for emotional equality

In the last 100 years, women have taken gigantic steps towards gender equality. But this time, I won't be discussing the feminist agenda. I want to approach a much less debated subject: men’s rights. As women have fought to become equal, they have taken many traditionally "masculine" qualities such as strength, competitiveness and confidence. Many of these masculine qualities are often seen as positive and well desired attributes within personal development.

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Kalyss Mercury
MKM's Fetish Shopping in New York City.

Though the internet has given us access to a myriad of shopping opportunities, some things you should still touch before you buy. In my blog “The TOP TEN TOYS all dominants should have”, I recommended people visit specialized BDSM shops for some of the items, such as floggers and collars. [link to the blog] Latex clothes are also rather hard to buy without trying them on. So, as I have recently visited the Big Apple, I created a little map to help you peruse New York’s finest fetish & alternative shops. So put your walking shoes on and time to hit the streets!

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Kalyss Mercury
The Science of Kink

Although the media loves the fetish style, the taboo is still there. Interestingly, how come thousands of BDSM fiction stories have not “made it” to a mass market, while 50 Shades of Grey, with all its typos and bad grammar went on to sell millions of copies? 50 Shades portrayed BDSM as something that was “cured by love”, implying that BDSM is still widely accepted as a form of “sickness” with the between the lines message: “If you really love someone, you won’t do that to them.” So, while fetish and kink may be more visible and polemic in popular media, for the general population, including the academic world, BDSM acts are still connected to ideas of trauma, disease and dysfunction. This negative stigma is harmful for kinksters as it assumes that we are damaged individuals, and therefor, we must change this perspective!

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Kalyss Mercury
TOP TEN TOYS for BDSM Play

Many aspiring dominants ask me what they need to get started with their kinky toy arsenal. Fetish toys are usually expensive, so this list will give you my favourite and most versatile toys. Of course, what you get will be strongly guided by your own personal fetish interests - this is just a guide for beginners who have no clue what to get first. As your toy box grows, you'll figure out what your own favorites are!

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Montreal Fetish Weekend 2014 Countdown!

Only one month to go for the biggest party weekend of the YEAR!!!

Non-stop fetish fun: Friday's Kabaret Kink + Meet Greet Play, Saturday's Latextacy pop animé Ball, Gods and Goddesses, Sunday's play party, Fetish Photo Convoi, Fashion Frenzy in the Village, Expo, Workshops, after-parties and more! "

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Kalyss Mercury
TOP 10 Rules for your 1st contact with a Mistress

1. Use a formal, polite and subservient tone.

If you haven't met Mistress, you won't know her style. She might be friendly and casual or strict and unforgiving. By using a formal tone you cover all bases. Most mistresses like to be treated like queens. Do you want her to feel strong and powerful when she reads your message? Then show your humility, politeness and submission with your words. It will start the interaction on the right foot.

2. Avoid profanity

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